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Soul

Self-Love Series: Acceptance

Acceptance is the first step in allowing self-love and healing to appear. Acceptance gives you the power to release resistance and surrender to what is.

Life is unpredictable, we all know this. Life is never safe and guaranteed, and what you have now does not mean it is fixed and will remain forever (whether in the positive or negative sense). There is no true formula for success in life. There is an impermanence to life. Even though life may seem long (especially if you live to old age), I think most people would agree how relatively short it feels. Years speed by and before you know it, all the things you wanted to do or meant to do are discounted from your capabilities (by your own acknowledgement).

No matter what your situation or your circumstances, only through acceptance can you move forward.

I learnt this lesson through a relationship break-down (read article here). Only from a place of acceptance of my situation and what had happened, could I begin to pick myself up and rebuild my life. Accepting the present also moved me from a negative, defeatist mindset to a more positive and optimistic mindset. It also helped me see that I didn’t need all the answers at that moment. I didn’t need to have all my future plans mapped out and I didn’t need to know how I was going to pick myself up. By accepting and not resisting what was, it allowed me to feel calm and know that in that moment I was actually okay. By doing this, an ease was welcomed in and in the midst of a heartbreaking time, life felt somewhat smooth again. I began to come back to myself again and feel whole.

Acceptance is a choice (and most definitely a very difficult one!) but with it comes more peace and happiness. Choosing to embrace and accept the event (whatever it may be – death of a loved one, loss of a child, job, home etc) causes much less misery in the long run than trying to fight against it. At the end of the day I truly believe there is no such thing as coincidence, all things happen in perfect timing for each of us, and from each event there is an opportunity to develop and grow.

It’s also important to say that acceptance is not a sign of weakness or it doesn’t mean being complacent or walking around with your head in the sand. Quite the opposite in fact, it means being present and being fully aware of your situation and where your at. Acceptance gives you the skills to live in an ever-evolving world and ultimately ensures freedom from things outside of our control. From this standpoint you can begin to see other doors and move forward again.

It takes practice but below is a mantra you can repeat silently to yourself. Take a few moments to sit or lie in stillness and say;

‘I accept my current situation and I welcome all opportunities and learnings from this moment’.  

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